Living in Harmony

Buddhist advice for peaceful, loving, respectful relationships

An online course with Andrew Olendzki

We can live in harmony

It is nearly impossible to avoid conflict in today's world—and our tendency toward hostility and discord hasn't changed much over the millennia. In ancient India, the Buddha came to realize that the underlying cause of conflict is, in fact, a thorn lodged deeply within our own heart and mind.


In this 8-week course, Buddhist scholar and teacher Andrew Olendzki will guide us through the historical Buddha's teachings on how to dislodge that thorn. We'll explore his advice for dealing with conflict, fear, pain, and violence, and discover our innate capacity to live together peacefully.




Choose a pricing option

The Buddha teaching his first five disciples

A shared practice

Many are familiar with the popularized image of a lone meditator sitting cross-legged on a cushion or under a tree. But enlightenment is not actually an individual effort. It is deeply connected to the well-being of our family, friends, and the wider world. According to the Buddha, the key to building healthy relationships with yourself and others is to confront the seeds of conflict that reside within us.

In Living in Harmony we'll spend eight weeks looking at what the historical Buddha taught on dealing with conflict, fear, pain, and violence, and our innate capacity to live together peacefully. 

In each unit Andrew Olendzki will skillfully guide us through early Buddhist literature, focusing on the ethical integrity necessary to:

  • Confront the root causes of conflict in your own heart
  • Turn harmful impulses into beneficial ones
  • Glean important lessons from others on how not to act
  • Work on skillful communication tactics that stem from empathetic listening.
A Buddha statue carved into a rock face

Benefits

You will learn:

  • That the cause of all human conflict is found in internal rather than external conditions
  • How to glean important lessons from others about how not to act
  • That every discord-causing impulse has a counter-impulse that contributes to health
  • Why criticizing views is more effective than criticizing the people who hold them
  • How to avoid four unskillful ways of speaking and replace them with skillful ways
  • Seven factors that contribute to the flourishing of organizations
  • Six factors that contribute to social harmony.

Testimonials

This was a wonderful course, and I believe I will review it again in the future. Andrew did a wonderful job making this accessible.
Andrew pulled together a wonderful course; the weekly lesson was not too much to be digested within a week, but it gave me a great deal to reflect upon for the week. I think this is by far my favorite course I have taken with him as I felt that the subject matter and the readings he chose spoke to me on a deep personal level. I appreciated the "Practice" element on how to use the teachings in daily life as well as the Summary to pull it all together at the end of the unit to recap the weekly lesson.
Andrew's teachings continue to inform and enrich my life.
Another enjoyable, insightful and practical course by Andrew. I'm grateful for these courses.
Andrew is one of the only teachers who consistently uses the Pali Canon for his work, and what better source could we utilize?

How the course progresses

This is a self-study program. Each unit is designed to be absorbed, reflected on, and practiced over the course of a week but you can progress entirely at your own pace. 

This is a standalone course: no previous knowledge or study is required. You are encouraged to explore at your own pace and will retain access to the course once it has ended.

Unit 1 | The Roots of Dispute

The Buddha was an astute observer of human psychology and behavior, especially the unsavory aspects of our being, such as our tendency toward violence, competition, and conflict with others. By looking inward we can recognize unwholesome qualities, see the harm they cause ourselves and others, and abandon them.

Unit 2 | Clarifying Your Own Mind

No one likes to be criticized, and we certainly don't go around asking people to point out our flaws or weaknesses. But learning to live in harmony with others begins with a truthful exercise in self-reflection. We get along best in communities when we can recognize difficult qualities within ourselves and learn to let them go.

Unit 3 | Nurturing Healthy Impulses

When we learn to disrupt our habitual patterns of thinking and reacting, we're able to steer the mind away from harmful impulses and toward healthy ones. Instead of fueling the fires of greed, hatred, and delusion, we extinguish them with the cooling waters of kindness and wholesome insight.

Unit 4 | The Way Without Conflict

It's hard not to take criticism as a personal affront or a call to arms. On the other hand, flattery can fan our egos and lead to self-aggrandizement. This week we'll learn how to communicate in a way that won't jump-start our primitive defense mechanisms—the ones that often lead to conflict.

Unit 5 | Speaking Skillfully

In many Buddhist traditions, how we speak is a topic of utmost importance. The masters understood that words could sow discord between people, or that speech could help nurture and support others. This week we'll explore how our quality of mind shapes our language, and how we may, in learning to attend to the mind's patterns, abandon unskillful forms of speech entirely.

Unit 6 | Collective Welfare

What makes for a well-knit, thriving community? According to the Buddha, there are seven principles that foster communal well-being. When put into practice, these factors make space for healthy dialogue and prioritize kindness, generosity, and mutual respect over anger, resentment, and hostility. This week we'll hone in on the qualities of mind that can sustain entire organizations, as well as practical group exercises.

Unit 7 | Creating Love and Respect

Why do we wield weapons and build walls? Whether it be family, friends, complete strangers, or foes, the truth is, it's not always easy to get along with others. The Buddha, however, was an optimist—he believed that we are wired to be friendly. This week we'll focus on qualities, such as metta (lovingkindness), that are not only essential for communal harmony, but are also practices we can cultivate and summon in any situation.

Unit 8 | Living in Concord

Spiritual community, or sangha, stands alongside the Buddha and his teachings in importance—in fact, it's one of Buddhism's precious three jewels. In this final lesson, we'll look at a historical example from the Buddha's time of what it means to live in harmony with others. It is through our own living practice, open dialogue, friendly debate, and relationships that we can investigate these teachings and put them into action.

Andrew Olendzki

Meet Andrew Olendzki

Andrew Olendzki, PhD, is a Buddhist scholar, teacher, and writer living in Amherst, MA. Trained at Lancaster University (UK), the University of Sri Lanka (Perediniya), and Harvard, he worked in leadership positions for 25 years in Barre, MA, first at the Insight Meditation Society and then at the Barre Center for Buddhist Studies, where he was the Senior Scholar.

Andrew has taught at various New England colleges (including Amherst, Brandeis, Hampshire, Harvard, Lesley, and Smith), and spent two years at the Mind & Life Institute working on the Mapping the Mind project. Andrew has contributed chapters to many books on Buddhist psychology, writes regularly for Tricycle: The Buddhist Review, and is the author of Unlimiting Mind: The Radically Experiential Psychology of Buddhism and Untangling Self: A Buddhist Investigation of Who We Really Are.

Detailed curriculum

Click the arrow below to see more

  Introduction: A Thorn in the Heart
Available in days
days after you enroll
  Unit 1: The Roots of Dispute
Available in days
days after you enroll
  Unit 2: Clarifying Your Own Mind
Available in days
days after you enroll
  Unit 3: Nurturing Healthy Impulses
Available in days
days after you enroll
  Unit 4: The Way without Conflict
Available in days
days after you enroll
  Unit 5: Speaking Skillfully
Available in days
days after you enroll
  Unit 6: Collective Welfare
Available in days
days after you enroll
  Unit 7: Creating Love and Respect
Available in days
days after you enroll
  Unit 8: Living in Concord
Available in days
days after you enroll
  Continuing Your Journey
Available in days
days after you enroll